So today I turned 20… I’m done college… I’m looking for a good job, preferably in the web field but for now I’m still stuck at Foodland in the deli. Though I know I’m still very young, it has really been getting to me that aside from being done school, not a whole lot is happening in my life. I work, then I relax at home or head off to the mall on my days off and repeat this week after week.
For me, finding a good job and hopefully a job related to what I went to school for, is my biggest priority, trying to figure out where these job opportunities are has certainly been a challenge. I’ve already been stressing about not having done any web work outside of school (other than my own personal site), and I’ve been ready to leave the grocery store for quite some time but I just don’t know where I’m going to go from there. I sent out almost 30 e-mails to local web companies, very few even responded but all said “NOT HIRING”. I was already worried after how hard it was to find a co-op placement but now getting few responses and negative ones when I did get a response is really making me worried that their isn’t much web work out there anymore. Take sites like these: WordPress or Blogger, Twitter, Facebook, etc… it’s possible to have a web presence without needing a website made by somebody else that is going to cost you money. There’s plenty of sites out there where you can set up a website for yourself in a matter of minutes. It’s a little discouraging, and I’m not sure if I’m going to end up doing much with my diploma. Regardless of what job I get, I still want- at the very least – to do some freelance web work. But then the next big question is: where am I finding clients and how are they going to find me? I have my own personal site, so if I can get my name out there and get people to know I am a web designer, then it shall be easy for them to find me, seeing how my URL is http://brittanydouglas.ca . But the biggest challenge is getting people to know my name. I potentially have a web site that I am going to be working on, it’s been discussed to some extent, but not really formally so we’ll see how that goes. I figure if I can at least do some websites for personal contacts, even if it means doing them for very cheap, at least I will have something to show on my site other than school assignments, which when I look at them now didn’t even go into much detail aside from our final site which was a semester long project.
On the other hand, while I’m still young, I want to be able to get out and do things with friends, maybe meet some new people and have some fun, things that I kind of missed out on while in school since I practically worked full-time while I was a full-time college student and I also had to commute to get to school so going out after classes was an issue, not having a place to stay at in town and / or a place to leave my car. I’ve been trying to allow myself more time with my friends this year- visiting my friend in Scarborough, spending a weekend in Toronto going to a concert and the MMVAs (which was a lot of fun by the way :D) and have a few days booked off to spend some time with my friend at her cottage- but even still I wish I had more opportunities to have fun with friends. I’ve never been an extremely social person, so going out at night with friends isn’t something I really do- though I want to – there is always something that I’m worried about that ruins opportunities. The littlest things make me fret and just take out the enjoyment of the plans. And I don’t know why, but I find I’m often the only one who really considers all the aspects of making these kinds of plans to go out, for example: who is driving (therefore who is not drinking unless we have plans to stay somewhere else), work the next day – making sure you will be able to get there on time, what TIME we plan to go out (always bugs me when the time is not really specific or it’s specific and then people are late!), etc. I am a worrier so yes I do over think things but at times some people just don’t think through all the important details enough so we need to find some sort of balance.
All in all I’m ready to really start moving forward in my life, and enjoying life in the process but there are still so many things that are not coming together yet. I am looking forward to finding a good paying job that I enjoy. I am looking forward to the day I can afford my own place, have a new experience. Looking forward to sharing my life with somebody, eventually starting a family and all around enjoying life and living comfortably. And though that could be a long ways into the future- my hope is that it will happen – I can’t wait!
But for now, I need to focus on the present and start making these things happen. But first, discovering how I can make them happen.
A lot of things to think about on my birthday, 20 is a big birthday, though I have been thinking about these things lots since I’ve been in college, so not exactly new thoughts but they are becoming more and more frequent. Just getting the day off has given me lots of time to really focus on all these things and decided I would share. I know many others are in this kind of “situation” so maybe others may be able to give me some insight or think about some things I have posted to help them too.
Well that’s about all I have to say for now.